Holidays

My sweet girl,
Oh, how we miss you! We just had Thanksgiving with the family at the old homeplace.
All your aunts, uncles, cousins and their children were there. But there was such
a huge hole in our little family because you weren't there.
I remember how you loved the holidays. You'd have me make an extra pan of dressing
for you to take home to share with Jeff. You loved the special mopping Granny C. used
to make and you'd put it on the turkey and the dressing. So when I was making the
dressing I thought of you. I thought of you when we were standing together for a family picture with me, daddy, and David clinging to each other.
Now we have to face the hardest holiday of all--Christmas. Erin, I miss shopping for you and with you. I have some of your little snowmen Christmas whatnots. Jeff told
me to get whatever I wanted of yours so I got them. But the first year I couldn't even
stand to look at them. Now I feel it makes me a little closer to you.
Where are you, my daughter-the love of my life? Where is Heaven? Where did you go when you left this earth? I know you believed that Jesus is your SAviour so I know you are with Him, but I don't know where it is. I always protected you since you were that tiny little beautiful baby they put in my arms after the long 28 hours of labor. I cherished each moment, each development in your early years. I watched you blossom into the lovely young lady who completed Jeff's life. Then, in one instant you were not here on earth anymore. You left us so unexpectedly. If I could have had just one more hug, one more embrace from my sweet girl. I know you were only on loan to us, but I felt you were part of my heartbeat. Now my heart doesn't beat as it did. Part of it is gone. I buried it the day I buried your beautiful body.
Oh, baby girl, the tears flow continually. Noone knows how we stand it. WE don't even know. David, your dear brother is having such a hard time of it. He doesn't understand. He was only 14 when you left us. He hurts for the missing of you in his life. He tries to hide it from me and daddy, but we know. We aren't much help to him, I'm afraid because we hurt so ourselves. WE just all cling to one another and to our Lord, who gives us strength to get through each day.
Lots of stuff is changing in the earth. There are wars and rumors of wars, just as it says in the Bible. So we know it won't be too long until we will get to be where you are.
I just want you to know how very much we miss you and still love you with all our heart.
loving you with every breath,
Mama
11/29/08