I'll see you again

My sweet Erin,
Not a day goes by without many, many thoughts of you! I see a shopping mall, a little girl, a familiar store where we spent time together. And I think of you.
I see a sunflower or a flower in the yard that you planted. And again you are on my mind. I go into the attic to store some silk flowers and there is a little doll or a Barbie Camper set and I think of you. I open a book and you wrote your name there many years ago and I think of you. I look at the sadness in your daddy's eyes and I think of you. You are always on my mind.

How does a mom keep living when she buries a child? She hurts deep inside every day. She hides the tears from her other child and husband to keep them from feeling the pain. She keeps washing dishes, vacuuming the floor, shopping for groceries. She keeps busy to keep from feeling the gnawing pain of sorrow. She wears a smile when she greets a friend. But she alone knows that the smile doesn't mean what it did before. She survives life and, all the while, she is looking forward to the day she enters Heaven's Door and there she is...her beautiful Erin..my beautiful Erin and my little Heather girl who I never held in my arms. She waits. She hopes. She dries the tears and keeps living for the ones who are left..

I never forget you. You are always on my mind!

I love you now. I loved you then. I love you forever.
Mama